This week my husband and I met with an older friend of his for dinner in Atlanta, Georgia. He said that his oldest son came home from college and mentioned (without bitterness!) there were some ways that perhaps their parenting could improve for the other 2 kids still at home. My husband said, “Oh, was he studying psychology?” The friend said, “Oh no. He had just gained some good insight as he was away from home.” He went on to say that he appreciated his son doing that because when he and his wife chose to do things differently as parents and had to draw some boundaries, their parents were defensive and unwilling to hear. Not only was this man NOT threatened by his son’s constructive criticism, he acknowledged that he was right and it created some needed change in their family dynamic. As my husband and I were heading back to our hotel, I told him that his friend was the kind of Christian parent I wanted us to continue to learn from.
It reminded me of Proverbs 18:13 that we were studying in Sunday School this morning — “To answer before listening— that is folly and shame.” How many times have we all been guilty of this? Praying for Maple Key students to always be able to cultivate active, empathetic listening. We must remember that underneath all explicit conversation, is an implicit desire for the speaker to be known. If people are willing to be vulnerable and share their stories and opinions, that is a sign of trust and carries immense weight. May we remember it as such.
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