Crumbs and Clutter in an AirBnB: Thoughts on a Well-lived in Space

I recently watched a short video where someone pointed out how many popular TV shows of late have been promoting a very clean aesthetic for their characters to live in. Whether it’s an apartment or a house, the scenes look like they plopped the characters into an AirBnB rental (a place where the goal is decidedly for it to feel lifeless and temporary so you can spread your stuff around for a bit). The person pointed out that in the 90’s the aesthetic for things, in movies especially, there was a lot of clutter and attention paid by set designers to make things look lived in. See below: HGTV teen bedroom vs. Kelly Kapowski’s bedroom from Saved by the Bell.

Kelly Kapowski's bedroom in Saved by the Bell.


There’s probably a whole different blog post waiting to be written breaking which genre of shows are doing this modern Martha Stewart magazine clean home or what mediums lean more toward it. That’s not what I’m trying to get into here.

Taken at face value, if the “no clutter look” is an actual trend, what does that say about what they are trying to project on to these characters’ lives? My teens would call it minimalist-maxxing. These characters don’t have a favorite trinket passed down from their grandmother on display or a piece of art on their fridge that their niece made them. These characters also must have a scheduled weekly house cleaner, always put things back where they found them, or never live in their home to make it dirty. It’s almost as if the clean space is the only thing that can regulate them. I believe you can have a clean home and still display what matters to you, but these shows seem to be saying something about the actual values and interior lives of the character beyond “clean spaces are good”.

One person put in the comments of the video that perhaps they were doing it to cut down on continuity errors (i.e. having a shot where a soda can was on the table and then next scene it’s magically disappeared because it was shot on another day) to which someone else replied, “My whole life is a continuity error with children! I put a remote down in one room and the next day it has moved to another room.” So true, Mr. Internet Commenter.

That got me thinking about what makes Maple Key Tutoring unique. Every week I, and my tutors, get to visit lived-in homes to discuss big ideas and the everyday-ness of life. I am thankful when I see a few cheerios on that floor that haven’t been swept up. I love seeing a handful of leftover party decorations on the table where the family had a big celebration with friends and family the night before. There are stories behind the mess, stories I get the privilege of hearing and connecting with each week.

It makes me feel like my imperfect life, and a life with a larger family, can be normal.

And judging from the feedback we get from our families, they appreciate the no pressure attitude our tutors come in with. If anything, we give full commiseration with what didn’t get put away or tidied up the way we would have wanted before the demands of the day creep in. That’s what makes our program feel so relational… because it is on every level! Any business can be transactional, but we work hard to steer away from anything other than supporting interdependence. When two of my dear friends unexpectedly passed away within a week of each other this past February, what a blessing to come to a table with crumbs each week and respond with my own crumbs when asked “How are you doing?”.

We need many diverse voices in our lives and the lives of our children and that starts with one untidy household at a time.

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